Wednesday, January 14, 2009

What happened?!

That was crazy! For probably half an hour after work I was like a kitchen Tazmanian devil! Just a whirlwind through the fridge and pantry and it was over - I don't even know what happened - just a trail of wrappers in my wake and a dazed look on my face and I hadn't even felt like I'd been having cravings.
I was hungry and had too much of a headache to start my workout right away, so I ate my 2nd Clementine on the way home and then had a chocolate chip granola bar when I got home - that wouldn't have been bad at all, but then I had more rice crackers and hummus and about 20 barbeque chips..and then for some reason I made a bowl of ice cream - almost a cup with sprinkles and a Reece's PB cup. And it just kept snowballing - I had another granola bar, 2 mini candy canes, a truffle and 2 ginger chews. That really came out of nowhere.
The silver lining for me is that if I'd done that before I would've ruined my dinner as well, but yesterday I just had a bowl of coconut, lemongrass, tofu and veggie soup with broccoli and lemon and a ton of water.
I really felt the effects though - my anxiety skyrocketed and my concentration plummeted.
I need a plan the next time that happens. To have a cup of tea, chew gum and go for a walk maybe before I eat any more than I'd planned....

So - breakfast, lunch, dinner and my first snack were great yesterday. I drank enough water. I ate my fruits and veggies. I took my multi. Can I just ignore the afternoon disaster?! No? It doesn't work like that?
Oh well - I guess today's a new day and hopefully a better one diet-wise.

School is already stressing me out! (grad school). I wish I hadn't signed up for classes this semester. I feel like if I didn't have a job and if I wasn't in grad school, that getting myself healthy could be a full time job - just learning new habits, going to counseling (which I never did after my dad died and know I still should), exercising, sleeping enough, learning new ways of thinking and organizing....yeah....I have a long way to go and that could, for sure, be a full-time job.
Of course teaching is more than a full time job.
So - I know I really shouldn't be taking on school now.
If I drop before Friday I can still get an 80% refund.
I'm going to do my readings for class today (7 articles), go to that class tomorrow and then see how I feel.
I'll update today's food journal tonight.


Rachel said...

I hope today is going better for you! I'm trying to keep really hydrated today as a possible antidote to stress eating... perhaps that'll help.

Keep us posted about the school decisions!

AmeliaPontes said...

Evenings are always tough for me too. I do well the entire day, then all of this stress just piles on and I start rummaging through the entire kitchen. Water is definitely a good way to fill than anxiety, but I also like fat free hot cocoa. It's sweet, takes longer to drink and it tricks my brain into thinking it's really having chocolate.

Hope you have a good day!

Rachel said...

Hot cocoa is a great treat! I'll definitely try that next time.
I do this all the time. I never have any sort of cravings before lunch. But an hour or so after lunch, no matter what I eat or how much I eat, I usually want something sweet. I can't indulge at work because I don't pack that stuff in my lunch, but I get in trouble after work and before dinner. I think I need healthy snacks, AM workouts and early dinners to be successful. far so good :)